Showing posts with label hellblazer episode guide. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hellblazer episode guide. Show all posts

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Looking To The Stars - Hellblazer Episode Guide, Part Six







For those playing catch-up, here’s
PART ONE, PART TWO, PART THREE, PART FOUR and PART FIVE.

And once again, here’s all the things we’ll keep track of as we go along. Just for laughs, eh?

Plot - What happens in the story worth noting, without giving away too much. Our job isn’t to tell you the story. It’s to help those who read the story keep track of the details. Go buy the comics and read them yourself, you lazy, cheap wankers!

Prominent People - Characters whom we see more than once. First appearances, mentions of reoccurring characters, anything on the hierarchy of Hell and real life figures drawn into the story and anyone else who deserves noting.

Deaths - Any deaths of prominent people or any particularly gory and interesting ways of dying. This is a horror book, after all. Also, a running tally of all the times John has directly been involved in a friend or family member’s death. Deaths of enemies, except where John directly murdered the person in question, are not counted. Instances where it is unclear if the person died (Talbot in Issue #22) or where they probably would have died with our without John showing up (i.e. Una in Issue #25) are not counted.

John Screws Up - This happens quite a bit, but anytime John is directly or indirectly responsible for some bad thing or another happening, we note it. We advise not making a drinking game of this for two reasons – first, you’ll get pissed very quickly and be unable to keep reading and second, because you might spill lager on your comics!

Pub Trivia - Anything else worth noting that doesn’t fit one of the other categories.

Simple enough, right? And now to the last, and most recent, of the extended 40-issue Hellblazer runs...




The Mike Carey Run


Hellblazer #175-215




It was a time of rebirth for Vertigo Comics in late 2002. Sales were down across the board and many of the flagship titles that started the line were floundering or dead. Brian Vaughn, not yet the darling of fanboys everywhere, had ended a two-year run on Swamp Thing that was a critical disappointment. Hellblazer was in similarly dire straits, both with fans and critics. And even Sandman continued on only in a series of specials of varying quality and in a spin-off series staring Neil Gaiman’s Lucifer. This later book, easily the finest quality book Vertigo had at the time, was written by man named Mike Carey.

Perhaps Vertigo placed Carey on Hellblazer because of his success in creating a Sandman spin-off that was accepted by fans (who were notoriously harsh about anyone trying to follow up Neil Gaiman) and beloved by critics and hoped he could do the same to Hellblazer following the much-loathed Azzarello run. Perhaps it was because of his background in British comics, having created original series for 2000AD - which had proved to be a common factor in the background of the all the “great” writers of John Constantine. Or perhaps it was because Carey was, like John, a man of middle-years born-in-Liverpool and living in London.

Whatever the case, Carey’s first story on Hellblazer was a literal and figurative homecoming for the character after three years of being dragged around The States. It even featured artwork by Steve Dillon, considered by most to be the definitive Hellblazer artist. But would this prove to be enough to win back the fans? Only time would tell that tale...


Hellblazer #175 – High On Life (Part One of Two)

Plot - Newly returned to England, John sets about making contact with his family only to get dragged into a magical mystery involving the aura of evil that envelopes his sister’s new flat and a series of murdered young women.

Prominent People - First appearances of Angie Spatchcock (a waitress and amateur magician), Gladys Wren (a witch), Nigel Wren (Gladys’ skinhead son) and another unnamed man, who calls Gladys “mom” in the next issue. Appearances by Cheryl Masters (John’s older sister) and Tony Masters (Cheryl’s husband).

Pub Trivia - We find out that Cheryl and Gemma did receive word of John’s apparent death in an American prison (Hard Time). Gemma also apparently left home and become a teaching assistant in France and she sends postcards home though she never calls.


Hellblazer #176 – High On Life (Part Two of Two)

Plot - After seeing Angie to the hospital (and giving her a healing dose of his demonic blood), John sets about getting some answers from Mrs. Gladys Wren.

Prominent People - Cameo appearance by Watford, a policeman colleague of John’s from the Warren Ellis run.

Deaths - 38 on the death tally. Gladys dies of shock after being attacked by the ghost of one of the girls she was indirectly responsible for killing. It is possible, but unclear, that John may have killed the hood that attacked him with a broken bottle and that Angie may have killed Nigel with her attack on him. While such attacks aren’t usually lethal, it looks like the two murderers may have been left for dead and nothing is said about taking them to the police. The resolution here is somewhat unclear.

John Screws Up - John injects some of his demonic blood into Angie’s IV tube in the hospital in order to speed her recovery time so he can question her about her attackers and what she found out about Gladys’ apartment. He notes later that this was a mistake as Angie is just a dabbler and may not be ready to pursue the life a magus.


Pub Trivia - A hint of trouble to come – despite using an alias when talking to her, Gladys Wren calls John “Constantine” at one point, tipping off John that someone is messing with him. She also gives John a name – “Scrape”


Hellblazer #177 – Red Sepulchre (Part One of Four)

Plot - Returned to London and looking for Scrape, John finds himself stuck in the middle of a magical turf war with old friends and old enemies urging him to join their side.

Prominent People - First appearance of Domine Fredricks (a major player in the London magic community), Nicholas “Scrape” Gillis (a dealer in magical artifacts) Misha (a Russian sailor and Scrape’s lover) and Parker (owner of the Tate Club, last seen in Haunted). Cameos by Chas (who seems to be the only person not shocked to see John alive and well), Clarice, Albert and Map (all three John’s allies from the Warren Ellis story Haunted) Joshua Wright (the villain of Haunted, now a thug in Fredricks’ employ) and Gemma Masters (John’s missing niece).

Deaths - Scrape is killed, along with his Russian sailor lover, some six months before John comes looking for him.


Hellblazer #178 – Red Sepulchre (Part Two of Four)

Plot - Finding that Fredricks has the means to kill Gemma anytime he wishes, John is forced into aiding his search for The Red Sepulchre – a magical item apparently possessed by Scrape’s sailor lover that has a connection to John’s bloodline. Meanwhile, Fredricks’ thugs attack The Tate Club, forcing Clarice and Albert into hiding.

Prominent People - First appearance of Ghant (an elderly magician in the employ of Fredricks)

John Screws Up - John calls Angie asking for her to come to London to help him. Because of his smart-ass treatment of her two issues previous, she turns him down.

Pub Trivia - It is revealed in this issue that Clarice is responsible for having handed Gemma over to Fredricks and putting her in danger.


Hellblazer #179 – Red Sepulchre (Part Three of Four)

Plot - As John sets about digging through a warehouse full of artifacts looking for the Red Sepulchre, Clarice and Albert ready an attack against Wright and Fredricks.

Prominent People = Cameo in flashback of Aloysius Quinn – a relative of John’s on his mother’s side of the family, whose soul was apparently taken by The Red Sepulchre in the 1840s.


Hellblazer #180 – Red Sepulchre (Part Four of Four)

Plot - With Clarice and Albert in his debt thanks to a masterful con and some aide from Map, John has managed to get away from his captors. But it’s going to take a lot more magic and conning to rescue Gemma away from Fredricks.

Deaths - 39. 40 and 41 on the death tally. Thanks to John’s actions here, one of Fredrick’s thugs (Godall) becomes possessed by the spirit of Kali. He then goes on to kill Joshua Wright, another thug (Peake) and Fredricks himself. John then uses a spell on Godall that banishes the spirit and leaves him alive in the wreckage of Fredrick’s mansion before leaving with Gemma.

Pub Trivia - Gemma is reportedly angry and John for butting in and trying to get her out of his world. Also, we find out from Clarice at the end of the issue that Fredricks wanted the Red Sepulchre for a ritual to open a door between the living and the dead and that he had reoccurring nightmares about a very big dog.


Hellblazer #181 – The Game of Cat And Mouse

Plot - Warned of a magical assassination attempt by the ghost of an old friend, John is forced into a merry chase around London as he is perused by three of the most dangerous hunters in Hell.

Prominent People - Cameos by Watford, the ghost of Gary Lester, Clarice, Chas, Chas’s wife Rene and Chas’ granddaughter Trish. First appearance of The Lukhavim, demons specializing in hunting down souls.

John Screws Up - John sacrifices the ghosts of several mental patients in order to buy him time to spring a trap on the two Lukhavim that are chasing him.


Hellblazer #182 – Black Flowers (Part One of Two)

Plot - Angie and John are both separately pulled into investigating a magical disturbance in a Bedfordshire mental hospital.

Prominent People - First appearance of Angie’s brother Jason Spatchcock and Kev, a friend of Chas’ who works at the same garage who offers John a lift on his bike when Chas is forbidden to so much as light a cig for John. Also, first reference to King Arawn Pen Annuvin – The Celtic King of the Dead


Hellblazer #183 – Black Flowers (Part Two of Two)

Plot - With a doorway to the realm of the dead opened and his guards, the Gironnved, hunting down the spirits of old Celts seeking the pleasures of the flesh once more, it falls to John and Angie to close the door.

Deaths - 42 on the dead tally. John stabs one of the Gironnved to death as a sacrifice in order to close the portal to the realm of the dead.

Pub Trivia - There are dual flashback to #180 and #181 here, where John remembers Clarice’s words about what Fredrick’s hoped to do and the Lukhavim’s message about a dog pushing against the first door and Fredrick’s nightmares about some form of dog.


Hellblazer #184 – The Wild Card (Third Worlds: Part One)

Plot - John and Angie go on the road to find out more about the mysterious dog that threatens the world. But for John to get information from an old friend, he’ll have to risk his soul in a very dangerous game of Poker.

Prominent People - First appearances of Paho Bokhari (a magician) and Senor Gotereez (another magician). Cameo by Swamp Thing.

Deaths - 43 on the dead tally. John and Paho’s con results in Senor Gotereez’s getting stabbed to death to settle his bet.


Hellblazer #185 – Ordeal (Third Worlds: Part Two)

Plot - Traveling to Iran and a portal to Eden in search of answers about the mysterious dog, John is forced to stand trial for his theft of a sacred scroll.

Prominent People - First appearance of Salmi (an Iranian cab-driver with some form of magical tattoo), Ghursoon (leader of the Children of Cain) and Beriti (one of the Children of Cain, whom John seduced to steal a scroll) Cameo by Swamp Thing.


Hellblazer #186 –The Pit (Third Worlds: Part Three)

Plot - In Tasmania, John goes dream-walking to find a native Tasmanian to talk to about the mysterious dog. But it is Angie who will have a close encounter with the spirits of some very hostile natives.

John Screws Up - In making his dream-walk into the concentration camp, John forgets that the ghosts of the Tasmania natives are not likely to hang about someplace they were unhappy in the afterlife.

Pub Trivia - This issue marks John and Angie’s “first time” together. We also learn a bit more about Angie’s brother Jason, and his time in jail and apparent mental disorder.


Hellblazer #187 – Bred In The Bone: Part One

Plot - Sought out by Ghant, who has gone independent in the wake of Fredricks’ death, Gemma Constantine is recruited to take John’s place on a journey of some sort to a place where John and Ghant once fought something evil.

Prominent People - First appearances of Delilah (a prostitute), Paul (leader of a community of children), Beth (one of the girls in said community) and Bantham (a retired detective, with ties to Ghant and John).

Pub Trivia - We find out that Gemma has taken to using the surname Constantine. This is another of the rare issues without John as the main character. Indeed, he doesn’t appear at all except in flashback.


Hellblazer #188 – Bred In The Bone: Part Two

Plot - On Gruinard Island, Gemma finds herself trapped between some monstrous children and some diabolic humans as she tries to put right one of Uncle John’s past wrongs.

Prominent People - First appearance of Jinx, a bum.



Deaths - Bantham is ripped apart by The Demon Children in a rather gory display.

Pub Trivia - This is the issue where Gemma decides she really doesn’t want to follow in John’s footsteps. This is another of the rare issues without John as the main character. Indeed, he doesn’t appear at all except in flashback and at the very end.


Hellblazer #189 – Staring At The Wall: Part One

Plot - Back in London, John begins gathering allies to prepare for the arrival of The Shadow Dog. Meanwhile, Angie pays a visit to her brother to find that he is quite sane and having visions of The Dog himself.

Prominent People - First appearances of Nat Kuhn (aka Nathan Arcane – “the sane member of the family”), Alba Suria (a sorceress) and Donatus Chalice of the Closed Order of The Alexins (a man of God). Appearances by Map, Clarice, Angie’s brother Jason and, from The Sandman – The Ravi. Cameo by Swamp Thing.

Deaths - Chalice is killed by Alba’s magic after she is possessed by the Shadow Dog’s aura of madness. Thankfully, Map is able to subdue her before she kills anyone else.

John Screws Up - Chalice wouldn’t have died if not for John’s gathering of magicians – a fact that John will blame himself for out-loud next issue.


Pub Trivia - We find out Map’s real name – Ken Ondaatie.


Hellblazer #190 – Staring At The Wall: Part Two

Plot - An alliance is made as the magicians separate to do their respective duties. But is their course of action the right one?

Prominent People - First appearances of The Shadow Dog (a guardian of Man) and The Beast With No Name (the one creature that Adam did not name in the Garden of Eden and as such, the only one not limited to a single form).

Deaths - Though he has apparently been dead and possessed for a while now, we only just learn in this issue that Jason Spatchcock was possessed by The Beast With No Name.

John Screws Up - Without giving too much story away, it is made apparent that John has been tricked beautifully into destroying the means of his salvation.



Hellblazer #191 – Staring At The Wall: Part Three

Plot - With the partnership of magicians broken and The Beast With No Name feeding upon the minds and souls of humanity, John is forced to bring Gemma back into his life to create another plan.

Prominent People - Cameo by The Phantom Stranger. Gemma Masters returns.


Hellblazer #192 – Staring At The Wall: Part Four

Plot - With a little help from Chas and Swamp Thing, Gemma begins putting a comatose John’s plan into place.

Prominent People - Appearances by Chas Chandler, Gemma Masters and Swamp Thing. Cameos by Lucifer and Mazikeen (from Vertigo’s Lucifer book, also written by Mike Carey) and Tim Hunter (from Vertigo’s Books of Magic)


Hellblazer #193 – Staring At The Wall: Part Five

Plot - With all of his allies incapacitated, it falls to John to save the world. But can he save himself in the bargain and at what cost?

Prominent People - Appearances by Angie Spatchcock, Chas Chandler, Gemma Masters and Swamp Thing

Deaths - The Beast is devoured by the new Shadow Dog that Gemma conjures up.


John Screws Up - John’s plan, while saving humanity, costs Swamp Thing his soul and leaves John with amnesia.

Pub Trivia - The loss of Swamp Thing’s soul would be the centerpiece of the first six issues of a new Swamp Thing series that started shortly after this issue came out. These first six Swamp Thing issues were written by Andy Diggle, who would later go on to write Hellblazer.


Hellblazer #194 – Ward 24

Plot - Wandering the streets of London, an amnesiac John tries to help a burned little girl to the hospital. But though he is freed of his memories, John is hardly free of his fate as a psychic killer and a strange new enemy make themselves known to him.

Prominent People - First appearance of Peter Gill (a psycho killer, who someone learned the details of everyone in the world’s lives through The Beast With No Name) and Rosacarnis (a demon and daughter of Nergal), in the form of the girl Rose.


Hellblazer #195 – Out of Season, Part One

Plot - As Angie and Gemma get to work on tracking John down, Chas and family go on holiday and John blunders into an encounter with a new friend and a new enemy.

Prominent People First appearance of Rosacarnis in her demonic form and her butler Druoth. Appearances by Angie, Gemma, Chas, Chas’ wife Rene, Chas’ daughter Geraldine, Chas’ granddaughter Trish, Jinx (the bum John helped back in #188) and Peter Gill. Cameos by The Phantom Stranger, The First of The Fallen, The Demon Constantine and Triskelle, Queen of the Succubi.

Deaths - 44 on the death tally. Jinx dies because of his friendship with John.


Hellblazer #196 – Out of Season, Part Two

Plot - Things go from hot to hotter, with Peter Gill holding Chas and family hostage and Rosacarnis offering John the return of his memories in return for his allegiance to her.

Prominent People - First appearance of Agilieth, sworn brother of Nergal.

Deaths - 45 on the death tally. John shoots Peter Gill at point-blank range to save Chas and his family.


Hellblazer #197 – Stations of the Cross, Part One

Plot - Still suffering from amnesia and taunted by Rosacarnis, John stumbles into the machinations of another old associate in a most unusual church.

Prominent People - Cameo by Ghant. First appearance of Suzie, Terry and Margaret (disciples of Ghant’s cult)


Hellblazer #198 – Stations of the Cross, Part Two

Plot - Completely at Ghant’s mercy, John find an unexpected ally. But with his memories and his usual cunning still unavailable it may prove to be too little, too late.


Hellblazer #199 – Stations of the Cross, Part Three

Plot - With a horde of demons bidding on his soul, John faces a tough choice regarding Rosacarnis’ offer.

Prominent People - The First of The Fallen and Agony and Ecstasy are among the demons who show up to bid on John.

Deaths - 46 on the death tally. Suzie is killed for her attempts to help John by the other cultists.

John Screws Up - By agreeing to Rosacarnis’ offer here, John sets into motion the tragic events that will lead us throughout the rest of Mike Carey’s run on Hellblazer.

Pub Trivia - Agony and Ecstasy, presumed dead since the Garth Ennis run, are seen alive and well. Presumably The First of the Fallen revived them having felt he made his point. Also, it would seem that John’s request for God’s intervention at the end of The Paul Jenkins run took since The First of The Fallen’ made no mention of already owning John’s soul after having handily claimed it during “How To Play With Fire”.


Hellblazer #200 – Happy Families

Plot - Trapped into one day’s service under Rosacarnis, John lives several years in three alternate lives in one day and sires three demonic children.

Prominent People - First appearances of Adam Constantine (a young boy), Saul Constantine (an older male teenager) and Maria Constantine (a younger female teenager). There are cameos in the dreamed-up alternate lives of Kit Ryan (John’s lost love from the Garth Ennis days), Zed (John’s lover and accomplice from the Jamie Delano run), Angie Spatchcock, Gemma Masters, Abby Cable (Swamp Thing’s wife) and Swamp Thing.

Pub Trivia - John gets his memories back at the end of this issue.


Hellblazer #201 – Event Horizon

Plot - Three thugs break into John’s lock-up of magical artifacts and come into contact with a cursed bracelet.

Pub Trivia - This is one of the few stand-alone stories during Mike Carey’s run on the book and the only one that is not directly tied into another story.


Hellblazer #202 – Reasons To Be Cheerful, Part One

Plot - John’s demonic children are set loose on the world and begin to tear his life apart, friend by friend.

Prominent People - Cameos by Alba Suria, Albert, Clarice and Map.

Deaths - 47, 48, 49, 50 and 51 on the death Tally. Maria Constantine kills Alba Suria with her own power. Albert is killed during Adam’s attack on the Tate Club protecting Clarice. And thanks to Maria’s seduction of a truck-driver while on the road, everyone in Chas’ family is burnt to death in a fiery explosion, though Chas himself is somehow spared.


Hellblazer #203 – Reasons To Be Cheerful, Part Two

Plot - John’s children continue to work against all of his friends and allies as John finds a mysterious ally in Hell, who now possesses Chas Chandler’s body.

Prominent People - Nergal, though we won’t know it’s him for a while yet, makes his first appearance in a long while through first a rat and then Chas Chandler’s body. Cameos by Straff and Straff’s Mother (from the Jenkins run) and the ghost of Sir Francis Dashwood (from Eddie Campbell’s brief run). We also get an update on the whereabouts of Angie and Gemma. First appearance of Simon, a boy dating Gemma who is approached by Saul Constantine about killing her.

Deaths - 52, 53 and 54 on the death tally. Straff and his mother are both cut apart by telekinetically manipulated flatware. And the ghost of Sir Dashwood is dashed out by Adam Constantine.

Pub Trivia - Nergal drops a hint to his identity here, saying that he has known John for even longer than Chas has known him.



Hellblazer #204 – Reasons To Be Cheerful, Part Three

Plot - As John and his uneasy ally begin to try and rescue some of John’s loved ones, Angie is tormented by the nightmares from her childhood and Gemma prepares for what could be a very deadly date.

Prominent People - Cameos by Tony Masters (Gemma’s father), Helen (an old girlfriend of John’s), Mange (the magician trapped in a rabbit’s body from Hellblazer #63), Robbie Brooks (the amateur magician who John pretended to curse in Hellblazer #62) and Uncle Fred, Cousin Terrell and Brother Kyle (from Dani’s family in ‘Up The Down Staircase’)

Deaths - We are told that a hecatomb of people who loved, mistrusted or had even met John Constantine are killed behind the scenes in this issue. The only confirmed deaths we get for the tally are 55, 56, 57, 58, 59 and 60 for Helen, Mange, Robbie Brooks, Uncle Fred, Cousin Terrell and Kyle.

Pub Trivia - Nergal drops another hint to his identity here, knowing about John’s time in Ravenscar and also noting that Angie’s blood tastes like John’s – as John’s original demonic blood downer, he would presumably know. It is interesting to note that nothing is said specifically about any of the women in John’s life in all this cleansing, though you’d think Kit or even Marj or Zed would be among the first targets John’s children would go after.


Hellblazer #205 – Reasons To Be Cheerful, Part Four

Plot - With Angie safe, John and his mysterious new ally burn pavement to save Gemma from John’s children, little knowing they already have a new target in mind.

Prominent People - Cameos by Tony and Cheryl Masters (Gemma’s parents)

John Screws Up - John makes a major error in judgment here, going after Gemma before Cheryl – not trusting Gemma to take care of herself against a relatively mundane threat when Cheryl was in just as much, if not worse, danger.

Pub Trivia - Nergal reveals himself to John in this issue, raising the question of how he escaped the torments we saw him enduring back in Hellblazer #60.


Hellblazer #206 – Cross Purpose

Plot - Free from Negral’s possession but not from his influence, Chas Chandler wanders the streets with Maria Constantine close behind.

Pub Trivia - This is another of the rare issues where John is not the focus of the action.



Hellblazer #207 – Down In The Ground Where The Dead Men Go, Part One

Plot - With Cheryl technically dead and her soul dragged into Hell, John and Nergal form an uneasy alliance to storm Hell’s gates together.

Pub Trivia - Reference is made to Gladys, the soul-stealing serial killer from “High On Life”.


Hellblazer #208 – Down In The Ground Where The Dead Men Go, Part Two

Plot - As Angie and Gemma come to terms while waiting with Cheryl’s body, John is confronted by his old friend and his Demonic “better” half.

Prominent People - First appearance of Stercorax, brother of Nergal. Cameos by most of The Ghostly Horde, which now includes everyone killed in the last few issues, including Alba, Straff, Straff’s mom, Helen and Albert. Gary Lester appears, now in the service of The Demon Constantine.

John Screws Up - In order to win a fight with the Demonic version of himself, John allows Nergal to possess him.


Hellblazer #209 – Down In The Ground Where The Dead Men Go, Part Three

Plot - Nergal relates to John the story of how he had come to know John and how Rosacarnis had come to rule his House.

Prominent People - Cameo by The First of The Fallen, in flashback.

Pub Trivia - Most of this issue is a flashback that relates the events of the first year of Hellblazer from Nergal’s perspective. This is another of the rare (but increasingly common during the Carey run) issues where John is not the focus of the action.


Hellblazer #210 – Down In The Ground Where The Dead Men Go, Part Four

Plot - As John and Nergal continue their journey to Rosacarnis’ estates, Nergal tells John of how he came to be reborn in Hell. But is there something Nergal is not telling John?

Prominent People - Chantinelle The Succubus, last seen being tortured in “How To Play With Fire”, makes an appearance apparently having served her time for betraying The First of The Fallen.

Pub Trivia - It is revealed, although not made apparent, that Cheryl’s soul is in Nergal’s possession.


Hellblazer #211 – Down In The Ground Where The Dead Men Go, Part Five

Plot - Having reached the keep, Nergal and John part ways to launch a two-pronged strike against Rosacarnis. But Nergal has something up his sleeve for everyone. Luckily, so does John.

Prominent People - Cameo by The First of the Fallen.

Pub Trivia - It becomes obvious that Nergal’s whole goal has been to get revenge on his daughter and he uses both John and Cheryl as tools (literally in the later case) to get himself into the invincible body of his brother Stercorax.


Hellblazer #212 – Down In The Ground Where The Dead Men Go, Part Six

Plot - With an angry and invincible Nergal at the door, it falls to John, to save the demonic family that exists only to destroy him if only to save his sister Cheryl’s soul.

Deaths - 61, 62, 63, 64, 65 and 66 on the death tally. The First of the Fallen, in order to deny John a noble and heroic death, kills Rosacarnis, Adam and Saul Constantine. He rips apart Nergal to get Cheryl’s soul free and then, already possessing the soul of the damned Tony Masters (suicide + his wife’s murder), convinces Cheryl to stay in Hell so that Tony’s punishment will be halved.

John Screws Up - All of John’s planning here, and he still loses. Cheryl is damned to hell and Gemma’s trust/love for her cunning uncle is completely shattered.


Hellblazer #213 – The Gift

Plot - A flashback tale, John tells Angie of the first time he conned somebody into thinking he was a more powerful magician than he really is.

Prominent People - First appearances of Kenny Nelson and Anita Nelson.


Hellblazer #214 – R.S.V.P. , Part One

Plot - John tries to get his life back into some semblance of order and patch things up with his best friend. But it won’t be nearly as easy to get back into routine as he hopes and indeed John is spurred to make a very big decision about his life.

Prominent People - Appearances by Chas and Chas’ cousin Norma. Cameos by Map and Clarice.

John Screws Up - We find out that thanks to John’s involvement with Nergal and what Chas did while he was still under the influence, Rene has left Chas and his own daughter refuses to speak to him anymore, having cost Chas his family as sure as if John had killed them himself.


Hellblazer #215 – R.S.V.P. , Part Two

Plot - John readies himself to end his magical career with style, giving a speech at The Tate Club that will turn every magician in London against him.

Prominent People - Cameos by Clarice and Swamp Thing. We briefly see Angie and Gemma at Cheryl’s funeral. The Ghostly Horde of John’s dead friends also make an appearance.




Recommended Reading






Quite honestly, if you’re going to read any of Mike Carey’s Hellblazer you’d best be prepared to read all of it. More than any writer, even including Garth Ennis, Carey’s entire run is one big story that demands to be read in order. Indeed, while one does not have to have read the entirety of Hellblazer before reading any of Mike Carey’s stories, it does make the experience all the richer.

Thankfully, more and more of Carey’s run is becoming available in Trade Paperback format and the single issues are still relatively easy to track down on-line or at a decent comic book shop. Even more thankfully, there is not a single bad issue in the lot, by my reckoning and only two stories in the whole run that do not relate or tie into another part of the overall arch.


The Final Analysis




Mike Carey was precisely the shot-in-the-arm the Hellblazer franchise needed to guide it after some very, very dark days. Unlike Warren Ellis and Brian Azzarello, who completely ignored John’s past and the rich creations of the writers who came before them, Carey picked up and built upon the mythology of the series just as Garth Ennis and Paul Jenkins did before him.

But Carey was no slouch when it came to his own creations and he created the ideal mate for John Constantine in Angie Spatchcock. Angie was, in all honesty, the first equal John had ever had romantically. Not to disparage the great Kit Ryan but while she was capable of handling herself, she was never truly capable of handling all of John’s life. Angie, for better or worse, was able to stand by John’s side in the midst of all the supernatural weirdness and be more than just a girlfriend.

To put it simply, I do believe that Mike Carey is my favorite writer to tackle John Constantine. Ennis was the funniest. Delano was the most hearfelt. Ellis’ was the most dangerous. And Jenkins was the most fun. But Carey managed to take the essence of all four takes on John Constantine and distill it into something different and yet wholly familiar.

I think Neil Gaiman said it best when he said that Mike Carey wrote “the quintessential Constantine.” For what it is worth, I agree with Mr. Gaiman.

Tune in next week. Same Matt time. Same Matt website.

Thursday, December 7, 2006

Looking To The Stars - Hellblazer Episode Guide, Part Five







For those playing catch-up, here’s
PART ONE, PART TWO, PART THREE and PART FOUR.

And just so we know what the score is, once again, here’s all the things we’ll keep track of as we go along. Just for laughs, eh?

Plot - What happens in the story worth noting, without giving away too much. Our job isn’t to tell you the story. It’s to help those who read the story keep track of the details. Go buy the comics and read them yourself, you lazy, cheap wankers!

Prominent People - Characters whom we see more than once. First appearances, mentions of reoccurring characters, anything on the hierarchy of Hell and real life figures drawn into the story and anyone else who deserves noting.

Deaths - Any deaths of prominent people or any particularly gory and interesting ways of dying. This is a horror book, after all. Also, a running tally of all the times John has directly been involved in a friend or family member’s death. Deaths of enemies, except where John directly murdered the person in question, are not counted. Instances where it is unclear if the person died (Talbot in Issue #22) or where they probably would have died with our without John showing up (i.e. Una in Issue #25) are not counted.

John Screws Up - This happens quite a bit, but anytime John is directly or indirectly responsible for some bad thing or another happening, we note it. We advise not making a drinking game of this for two reasons – first, you’ll get pissed very quickly and be unable to keep reading and second, because you might spill lager on your comics!

Pub Trivia - Anything else worth noting that doesn’t fit one of the other categories.

Simple enough, right? And now, a few brief words about the very brief run of...


The Darko Macan Run


Hellblazer #144-145




Best known for his work in Croatian comics, this two-issue story marks Macan’s only story for Vertigo comics and one of his few works written for the American comic book industry not published by Dark Horse. Like Eddie Campbell’s brief series, this comic puts John into the unfamilar magical traditions of another culture. It is an ammusing little story and it’s a shame that Macan did not write something more for Vertigo, on Hellbalzer or any other title.


Hellblazer #144 – Ashes and Honey, Part One

Plot - An investigation into the source of a dog returning from the dead leads John to a Bosnian teen attempting to follow in his Grandfather’s magician footsteps.

Prominent People - First appearances of Kemal (A Bosnian magician), Azra (Kemal’s daughter), Samir (Kemal’s grandson), Huso (a friend of Samir’s), Paul (a boy with an injured eye that Samir temporarily heals), Richie (A rich boy) and Lizzie (Richie’s sister, who Samir raises from the dead)


Hellblazer #145 – Ashes and Honey, Part Two

Plot - John attends the funeral of Kemal and uses his own magic to tidy up some of the loose ends Samir left behind.

Prominent People - First appearances of Zana (Samir’s pregnant sister) and Jimmy Brooks (a local boy, and father of Zana’s child)

And with the brief run of Darko Macan done, that leads us to...



The Brian Azzarello Run


Hellblazer #146-174




There are many Hellblazer fans who think that only writers from the UK should attempt to write John Constantine. They think that JC, being such a quintessentially British character can only truly be understood by someone who grew up in that environment. Looking at the Hellblazer run of Brian Azzarello, it is hard to dismiss this notion as being entirely illegitimate.

I hesitate to say that Azzarello’s run is a series of bad stories. It really isn’t. The broad plot is intriguing and the story is well-written. Yet at the same time, it isn’t really that good. And good or bad there is no denying that what Azzarello has written here, despite the inclusion of a man named John Constantine, is not like any Hellblazer seen before or since.

However, it is my personal opinion that reading Azzarello’s John Constantine is like watching a group of American high school boys attempting to reenact their favorite Monty Python skit in a talent show; you can see the broad brilliance underneath it all, but the execution leaves much to be desired.


Hellblazer #146 – Hard Time, Part One

Plot - John Constantine is put away in an American Prison and becomes a source of interest to one of the inmates.

Prominent People - First appearances of Traylor, “Candy” (Traylor’s prison bitch) and four of Traylor’s crew (who go unnamed). We also get introduced broadly to the various factions in the prison – The Crips, The Bloods, The Aryans, The Wise Guys (aka Mafia), The Bikers, The Guards, The Muslims, The Hispanics and The Lifers.



Hellblazer #147 – Hard Time, Part Two

Plot - The various gang leaders turn to the Mr. Stark, head of The Lifers – all telling their tales of how John Constantine has been getting the better of them.

Prominent People - First appearances of Carney and Shorty (two Skinheads), Ignacio (a Hispanic gang leader), Boxer (one of the Black gang leaders), Rakim (one of the Muslim gang leaders), Mr. Stark (leader of The Lifers) and Buzz (Mr. Stark’s right hand).

Deaths - Somehow, magically or through slight of hand, John switches his glass-laced breakfast with that of the brother of the inmate who was trying to kill him.



Hellblazer #148 – Hard Time, Part Three

Plot - To the displeasure of many, John starts working his way closer and closer to the seat of power in the prison.

Prominent People - First appearance of Kelly (a guard) and Weathers (a snitch)

Deaths - Stark shivs Kelly and frames John for the murder, cementing his tough guy rep in the prison and making him “a lifer”.



Hellblazer #149 – Hard Time, Part Four

Plot - Locked in Solitary, John is confronted once again by the ghosts of his dead friends as a prison riot breaks out.

Prominent People - First appearance, as a ghost, of Walter “Lucky” Fermin, though we don’t get his name yet. Brendan, Header and Rick can be seen in the ghostly horde, but the art is so cartoony it’s hard to identify anyone else.

Deaths - Buzz is thrown off a ledge by Stark.

John Screws Up - Reference is made to John somehow being responsible for Lucky’s death.



Hellblazer #150 – Hard Time, Part Five

Plot - With the riot calming down, a hostage negotiator is sent in to talk to the man running the prison – John Constantine.

Prominent People - First appearance of Frank Turro, Special Agent FBI. First mention of S.W. Manor – the rich man Lucky conned.

Deaths - 32 and 33 on the dead tally. John blames himself for Lucky’s suicide. Traylor appears to be in the final stages of being raped to death, John having worked a spell to make him appear to be a beautiful woman.

John Screws Up - We finally learn how John was imprisoned – he turned himself in after his con-artist friend Lucky asked him for help in dealing with the rich man who put a bounty on his head, John refused and then John stood idly by as Lucky shot himself.

Pub Trivia - John makes a deal with Turro – freedom in exchange for handing over the prison to the FBI and agreeing to find a way to go after S.W. Manor for the FBI



Hellblazer #151 – Good Intentions, Part One

Plot - On the road to Doglick, West Virginia, John has a chance encounter with some murderous thugs preying on stranded motorists.

Deaths - 34 and 35 on the dead tally. John somehow does something that allows him to survive a car-crash that kills two thugs and spares the woman they have tied up in the trunk.



Hellblazer #152 – Good Intentions, Part Two

Plot - John comes to Doglick, to tell Lucky’s family of recent events. They in turn invite John to help with the family business.

Prominent People - First appearance of Rose Fermin (an old friend of John’s), Dickie Fermin (Rose’s husband and Lucky’s brother – aka The Smart One), Richie Fermin (Lucky’s other brother - aka The Special One)

John Screws Up - John does something that leaves him downing shots and muttering “My God, what have I done?”. We don’t find out what, though, for another two issues.



Hellblazer #153 – Good Intentions, Part Three

Plot - Still unsettled by what happened the night before, John confronts Richie and Dickie and finally goes to look up Rose.

Pub Trivia - Contains a flashback to John’s punk days and his meeting Rose in London.



Hellblazer #154 – Good Intentions, Part Four

Plot - Something in the woods of Doglick is eating children. And John watches the tape of “what happened.”

John Screws Up - We finally find out what happened two issues previous – John, while drunk, received oral sex from Richie’s dog, while Dickie and Richie filmed it.

Pub Trivia - Contains a flashback to John’s punk days and his meeting Rose in London.



Hellblazer #155 – Good Intentions, Part Five

Plot - As the townsfolk hunt a monster boar, John readies himself to fight a different battle - and rescue two women from a different monster.

Deaths - 36 on the dead tally. Dickie is charged by the giant boar – a creature John seems to control, somehow.

Pub Trivia - Contains a flashback to John’s punk days and his meeting Rose in London.



Hellblazer #156 – Good Intentions, Part Six

Plot - The boar is dead and Dickie with him, but John – as usual – has managed to screw things up completely.

Prominent People - First mention of Marjorie, Lucky’s widow, whom John came looking for six issues back.

Deaths -Dickie is confirmed dead. Richie’s dog also dies a messy death.

John Screws Up - John thought he was saving a girl being held hostage by Richie and Dickie and Rose in the bargain. It turns out that the entire town is in on the sex-tape business, with Dickie and Richie taking the video footage they shoot with all the townsfolk, selling it on the Internet and supporting the town with the proceeds.

Pub Trivia - Contains a flashback to John’s punk days and his romance with Rose in London



Hellblazer #157 – “And Buried”

Plot - John and Agent Turro meet up, with Turro sending John on to the town of Highwater. Meanwhile, a group of thugs worry about a man who may not be quite dead.



Hellblazer #158 – Freezes Over, Part One

Plot - Snowed into at a bar in a small town, John finds a mystery when a man turns up dead, stabbed by an icicle.

Prominent People - First appearances of Keith (a bartender), Hope (his mail-order bride), an unnamed trucker, an unnamed corpse, Alma (an old woman), Rudy (an old man), Pete (a local), Jay (a father), Marnie (a mother) and Doris and Ellie (Jay and Marnie’s two daughters)

Deaths - 37 on the death Tally. We don’t find out until #161, but John talked a killer into committing suicide somehow.



Hellblazer #159 – Freezes Over, Part Two

Plot - The locals tell John the legend of the Ice Man monster, as a group of desperate men join the folks trapped in the bar.

Prominent People - First appearance of Dwight, Lamar and Waylon (three thugs)



Hellblazer #160 – Freezes Over, Part Three

Plot - The situation becomes tense as the three would-be robbers take hostages.



Hellblazer #161 – Freezes Over, Part Four

Plot - With lives on the line it falls to John and Pete to save everyone – with a little help from “The Ice Man”.


Deaths - Lamar bleeds to death. Dwight is shot by Hope. Waylon is stabbed with an icicle by Pete.



Hellblazer #162 –Lapdogs and Englishmen, Part One

Plot - Mostly told in flashback, John recalls a story of the punk days when he was hired to steal the Clock of Rasputin – supposedly able to tell the future.

Prominent People - Appearances by Gary Lester and Chas Chandler. First appearance of Angie White (another aspiring punk magician) and SW Manor (aka Stanley)


Hellblazer #163 – Lapdogs and Englishmen, Part Two

Plot - John and friends pull a con on Stanley, as Angie White, armed with a book that tells the life story of whoever you want, is horrified by what she reads on John Constantine.

Deaths - Angie White is killed by a mysterious figure.

John Screws Up - John mocks the idea of a magic artifact that tells the future here. Had he been kinder to Angie in the last issue, he might have learned that such a thing DID exist.

Pub Trivia - This issue marks one of the few times Chas seems to be actively involved (i.e. doing something besides driving) in one of John’s scams. The figure that kills Angie seems to be The First of The Fallen, though we never get a look at his face. He talks about the role he plays in John’s life and preferring that nobody knows the real role he plays. This begs the question – if it IS the First of the Fallen and he knew of what was coming in his life with Constantine, why didn’t he try to stop it?



Hellblazer #164 – Highwater, Part One

Plot - John tracks Marjorie Fermin to the racist militia-run town of Highwater.

Prominent People - First appearance of Marjorie Fermin, Jimmy and Kyle (two skinheads), Mister Gage (the skinhead leader) and Gwynneth (Mister Gage’s daughter)



Hellblazer #165 – Highwater, Part Two

Plot - Marjorie takes John to meet the man who changed her life, as the neo-Nazis arm themselves for a fight.

Prominent People - First and last appearance of Wolfman, an arms dealer.

Deaths - Wolfman is beaten to death after suggesting that Neo-Nazis would be cured of their racism by sleeping with a Black woman.




Hellblazer #166 – Highwater, Part Three

Plot - Angered by his followers incompetence, Gage strikes out at Jimmy. Meanwhile, John volunteers to clean up the mess and then suggest to Jimmy and company that Gage is waiting for a bigger test of their abilities.

Prominent People - First appearance of Shawn, a friend of Mister Gage. SW Manor and one of his employees also appear briefly.



Hellblazer #167 – Highwater, Part Four

Plot - John raises a golem to fight the neo-Nazis, as S.W. Manor pays a visit to Mister Gage.

Deaths - Jimmy is shot by the police while playing with his son and daughter.

John Screws Up - John frees Marjorie of Gage’s influence and Lucky’s ghost tells him the reason for his suicide even as he thanks John for his good deed. The reader does not read the reason, but it is enough to make John angry enough to try and punch Lucky and to tell Marjorie that she wasn’t worth saving or the effort of hating.



Hellblazer #168 – A Fresh Coat of Paint

Plot - John wins at Bingo, hires a hooker and meets up with Agent Turro one more time.

Pub Trivia - Turro changes look (again) but this is explained as being a result of his undercover work. Also, John finds out that on paper, he is legally dead following the prison riot.



Hellblazer #169 – Chasing Demons

Plot - John sits in a bar and drinks with strange strangers. Meanwhile, S.W. Manor has his cruel fun with a priest.

Prominent People - First appearance of Fredo (a guard), Father Sean (a priest with a photographic memory) and confirmation that S.W. Manor and “Stanley” from “Lapdogs and Englishmen” are the same man.



Hellblazer #170 – Ashes & Dust In The City of Angels, Part One

Plot - Turro steps into investigate a mysterious death at a Los Angeles S&M club – the mysterious, fiery death of one John Constantine.

Prominent People - First appearances of Detective Havlik (a cop) and Agent Gucardi (a coroner).

Pub Trivia - The fake clock of Rasputin is scene, conforming S.W. Manor’s identity more than the use of the name “Stanley” the issue before did.



Hellblazer #171 – Ashes & Dust In The City of Angels, Part Two

Plot - Turro continues to interview witnesses to John’s death – apparently caused by spontaneous combustion. Meanwhile, S.W. Manor is being haunted in his mansion by... John Constantine.



Hellblazer #172 – Ashes & Dust In The City of Angels, Part Three

Plot - Turro’s interviews continue, as S.W. Manor tells Father Sean about how he has used his fortune to hunt the paranormal – all the things his money could not touch – and how he hired Lucky Fermin to get back at John Constantine.

Pub Trivia - The plot is finally explained. S.W. Manor, who had developed a hated for John Constantine during “Lapdogs and Englishmen” paid Lucky Fermin, who knew John, to contact him and then kill himself, framing John for the murder, with all the money going to care for Lucky’s wife, Marjorie. S.W. was content to see John trapped forever, not expecting the riots to occur or John to die. This enables John, thought dead by the world thanks to Agent Turro’s interference, to surprise S.W. at the S&M bar and begin the slow process of seducing him.



Hellblazer #173 – Ashes & Dust In The City of Angels, Part Four

Plot - Turro and Havlik finally get the name of S.W. Turro in connection go John’s murder. Meanwhile, S.W. Manor continues his story for Father Sean and tells him of how his hate for John became love and how John promised to use his magic to give S.W. want the wanted most – a chance to talk to the parents he lost as a boy.



Hellblazer #174 – Ashes & Dust In The City of Angels, Part Five

Plot - As the LAPD and Agent Turro storm Manor’s manor, S.W. Manor finishes his story and how he and an equally vengeful Richie Fermin joined forces to kill John Constantine.

Deaths - We find out the burned body was actually Richie Fermin. S.W. Manor kills himself, thinking he really did kill John. Agent Turro is killed in the assault on the mansion.




Recommended Reading




The good news is that Azzarello’s entire run is available in trade-paperback format, so there’s no trouble getting it if you want to read it.

The bad news is that there is almost no reason WHY you’d want to read it, apart from a Constantinesque desire to stare at the train wreck.

In all honesty, it’s not that writing itself is BAD, really. It’s just that it isn’t Hellblazer.

Go back and reread all these entries. Notice how short they are? That’s because there’s nothing worth noting that relates to the overall story of John Constantine. There’s no supporting or returning cast worth caring about. No send-ups of British politicians worth noting. Not even any particularly noteworthy deaths. Gruesome deaths, to be sure, but nothing that truly inspires a reaction past “Well, that’s horrible... but what does it have to do with anything?”

The story of a man wandering the backwoods of the United States observing strange, sick things happening and taking a hand when he can could be a good one – but John Constantine is not the character to tell such a story with. Had this been told with a new character, it would have been a good story. In metaphorical terms, the plot is banging its’ head against the brick wall of the foundation of John’s character and it is doing little more than knocking itself senseless.

The John seen here is a total bastard who is driven to do the right thing only by a sense of guilt. There is no laughing magician – only a sneering sociopath. And it doesn’t work. At all. John can be a bastard yes, but underneath it all is the man screaming at the unfairness of the universe and trying, in his own way, to fight against it.


The Final Analysis




Years before Warren Ellis became a sad parody of himself, Brian Azzarello wrote this series of Hellblazer stories that were a sad parody of Warren Ellis’ Hellblazer stories. While some good stories have been done with the basic plot of “John investigates something weird and bad stuff happens”, the best Hellblazer stories have centered upon John in a mess of his own making or trying to help a friend and making things worse. It’s no shock then that the worst stories, for the most part, have involved John just being there as something bad happened and reacting to it.

Despite being an anti-hero, John works best as an active character, not a reactive character. Strictly speaking, there’s not much interest to be found in a bloke who is a total bastard who just happens to observe weird things happening. That’s all the Azzarello run is, really – a bunch of stories where John the unshakable just wanders around, stuff happens and eventually we get an explanation.

Mistakes in the art, such as switching between the hair-color of Richie’s brothers in Good Intentions and Agent Turro’s ever changing appearance (bald with a goatee in Hard Time to short-haired, balding and beardless at the start of Freezes Over to slightly-shaven headed and beardless in Highwater (which is explained away as being not an art mistake, but a serious attempt at disguise) only further complicated the confusion many readers had regarding this series.

Indeed, it took me three re-readings to figure out exactly WHAT THE BLOODY HELL HAPPENED during the last five issues.

This is decompressed, ass-backwards storytelling hitting an all-time low and even in the trades, like the knights in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, you just want to grab Azzarello and yell “Get on with it!”

Thankfully, for all Hellblazer fans, things were about to get a lot better very quickly.


Tune in next week. Same Matt time. Same Matt website.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Looking To The Stars - Hellblazer Episode Guide, Part Four








For those playing catch-up, here’s PART ONE, PART TWO and PART THREE.


And just so we know what the score is, once again, here’s all the things we’ll keep track of as we go along. Just for laughs, eh?

Plot - What happens in the story worth noting, without giving away too much. Our job isn’t to tell you the story. It’s to help those who read the story keep track of the details. Go buy the comics and read them yourself, you lazy, cheap wankers!

Prominent People - Characters whom we see more than once. First appearances, mentions of reoccurring characters, anything on the hierarchy of Hell, real life figures drawn into the story and anyone else who deserves noting.

Deaths - Any deaths of prominent people or any particularly gory and interesting ways of dying. This is a horror book, after all. Also, a running tally of all the times John has directly been involved in a friend or family member’s death. Deaths of enemies, except where John directly murdered the person in question, are not counted. Instances where it is unclear if the person died (Talbot in Issue #22) or where they probably would have died without John showing up (i.e. Una in Issue #25) are not counted.

John Screws Up - This happens quite a bit, but anytime John is directly or indirectly responsible for some bad thing or another happening, we note it. We advise not making a drinking game of this for two reasons – first, you’ll get pissed very quickly and be unable to keep reading and second, because you might spill lager on your comics!

Pub Trivia - Anything else worth noting that doesn’t fit one of the other categories.

Simple enough, right? So let’s get down to it and discuss...



The (brief) Return of Garth Ennis


Hellblazer #129-133





With Garth Ennis pushing boundaries in both good taste and what the comics medium could do with Preacher, it was only natural that Vertigo bring him back for another go at the character that made him, once the Jenkins run ended.

Son of Man is a serviceable enough a story, but to my mind it (not surprisingly, given when it was written) reads more like Preacher than your typical Hellblazer tale. It’s hard to say what makes this story feel so different but there are several possible factors.

One part of it is the artwork, which is quite different from the more realistic style favored by Steve Dillon during Ennis’ run. Pride and Joy artist John Higgins makes this story very surreal and almost cartoonish in appearance. Couple that with a plot and execution could almost be a West End farce were it not for the amazing amounts of blood, and you have one very silly but strangely dark story.

Another thing that makes this story unusual is John’s usual narration is spoken directly to the reader as he looks out past the fourth wall. While this device works okay in the introduction where John establishes himself as “a right miserable bastard” as he rants about the idea of children being considered sacred (indeed, this bit is one of the best introductions to John as a character ever, in this author’s opinion), it is somewhat odd as the story goes on and John breaks character in order to make a dry comment directly to the readers – though this could be more a fault in the art than the script.

Regardless, this story was a bit like a trip to see your parents during the holidays – different and unsettling, but not altogether unpleasant.



Hellblazer #129 – Son of Man, Part One

Plot - Chas, last seen abandoning John in the middle of nowhere during How To Play With Fire, shows up on John’s doorstep demanding sanctuary and help ditching a car. Little does he know that his run in with the infamous Cooper Mob has reopened a can of worms that John Constantine had hoped to have closed forever.

Prominent People - First appearances of Detective Inspector McNab (a bent cop), Mr. Fronts (John’s deranged next-door neighbor), Billy (John’s downstairs neighbor, a WWII veteran) and Sylvia (John’s downstairs neighbor, a non-militant lesbian)


Hellblazer #130 – Son of Man, Part Two

Plot - As The Coopers hunt for Chas, John tells the story of how he ran afowl of The Coopers himself and the dark secret he’s been hoping to forget for over a decade.

Prominent People - First appearances of Harry Cooper (a crime-lord), Norman Cooper (Harry’s brother, a gangster and a gay man), Ronnie Cooper (a dead boy, son of Harry) and The *uckpig (a demonic manifestation of the act of rape made flesh). Cameos by Brendan Finn, Ric the Vic and Header in flashback. Also an appearance by the ghost of Sid Vicious.

John Screws Up - John spells it out for Chas in detail, but basically he summoned a demon to possess the dead body of Harry Cooper’s son Ronnie since bringing the dead back to life magically is impossible. Granting that this was the best thing he could think of at a time when he was a) not at his best due to having just been sprung from the asylum and b) under pressure with the lives of Gemma and Cheryl at risk if he didn’t do what the Coopers wanted, this still resulted in an uncontrollable demon eventually being released upon the world.


Hellblazer #131 – Son of Man, Part Three

Plot - As the Coopers continue to search for the people responsible for the hit on Norman, John begins investigating the plans of the demon living inside Ronnie Cooper.

Prominent People - First appearances of “Little Ronnie Cooper” (in the flesh as it were), Carol (John’s downstairs neighbor, Sylvia’s very militant lesbian partner), Fessenheim (a psychic grifter and friend of John’s) and Gestapo (a psychotic thug in the employ of The Coopers).

John Screws Up - We find out that John missed Gemma’s birthday, much to her annoyance.

Deaths - Rather a horrific scene as John is buried under a horde of dead babies.

Pub Trivia - Famous for being “the one where John shags a lesbian”.



Hellblazer #132 – Son of Man, Part Four

Plot - As all-out war erupts between the gangs of London, John nurses a black-eye and finds himself the unlikely savior of Norman Cooper.

Prominent People - Cameos of Ric the Vic, Brendan and Header.


John Screws Up - John tries to talk things out with a confused Sylvia only to get a black-eye for his trouble when Carol walks in on the two of them in her bedroom. Also, in flashback, we find out that John’s skimping on his research wound up resulting in his summoning a REALLY bad demon to stuff into Ronnie Cooper’s body back in the day.


Hellblazer #133 – Son of Man, Part Five

Plot - “Little Ronnie” unveils his plan to bring about the birth of a Satanic Messiah and it’s up to John to save the world, assuming he can save himself first.

Prominent People - Cameos of Ric the Vic, Brendan and Header.

Deaths - Norman Cooper is rather roughly sodomized to death by the *uckpig after it leaves its’ shell. Gestapo is similarly ripped apart. Inspector McNab blows his own brains out before the *uckpig can get its’ hands on him. And Harry Cooper dies shortly after giving birth to the Demonic Messiah, which John kills with a fireaxe. Chalk up 30 on the Death Tally for that last one.

Pub Trivia - This marks another one of the few occasions where we see John directly kill someone.


With the end of Son of Man, we come to the beginning of a brief but important part of the Hellblazer Chronology. This run would be cut short by creative differences between the writer and the editorial staff of Vertigo comics. Whether you agree with the reasons behind the argument or not, it cannot be denied that this run has proven popular despite its’ brevity.


The Warren Ellis Era


Hellblazer #134-143




More than any writer before him, Ellis came onto Hellblazer as a rising star who was expected to do big things. Already a big name at Vertigo thanks to his work on Transmetropolitan, he would launch the mature-readers series Planetary and The Authority at about this same time in early 1999.

Sadly, while these series would go on to become legendary and build Ellis a devout fanbase, it was not to be with Hellblazer. Ellis came to blows with Vertigo editorial over one storyline, the now infamous Shoot - a story about the motivations behind school shootings that came out shortly after the Columbine High School shootings in the United States.

While Vertigo originally intended to let the story run as Hellblazer #141, they eventually decided the story proved too “insensitive” (some would say victim-blaming) and they decided to err on the side of caution (some would say chicken-out) and not run the story.

The entire issue of Shoot is available for reading, script and finished pencils and I urge all of you to take a look at the story and decide for yourself.

Angered by what he saw as an act of censorship, Ellis resigned his position as the writer on Hellblazer and racked up a run that proved, despite its’ brevity, to be popular enough to warrant collection in two trade-paperbacks; Haunted and Setting Sun.


Hellblazer #134 – Haunted, Part One

Plot - After reading about the death of an old girlfriend in the paper, John begins investigating her mysterious, magic-themed death only to have her ghost appear before him.

Prominent People - First appearance of Isabel (one of John’s old girlfriends), Watford (a police officer who John is blackmailing), Sanjay (a shopkeeper, from whom John buys his silk cut), Clarice (an old sorceress) and Albert (a ghost, and one-time court magician to the Cray Twins)

Deaths - 31 on the death tally. Though he hasn’t seen Isabel in years, John blames himself for her death as he was responsible for getting her interested in magic, which no doubt brought her into contact with her killer.

John Screws Up - See above: John blames himself for Isabel’s death, though he won’t learn who her killer is until next issue.


Hellblazer #135 – Haunted, Part Two

Plot - John starts using his contacts to track down Alister Crowley wannabe Joshua Wright, only to have his men find him.

Prominent People - First appearance of Map (a magician with a unique bond to London), Dareen (a “crack magician” who uses drugs to do magic) and Sparrowfart (aka Hawkstorm, a pimp, electrician and amateur magician)

John Screws Up - John walks into a rather obvious trap at the end of this issue – meet me alone someplace dark and secluded and all that.



Hellblazer #136 – Haunted, Part Three

Plot - Beaten to near death by Joshua Wright’s thugs, John calls Chas for help and sets about getting his revenge on Sparrowfart, who he figured ratted him out.



Hellblazer #137 – Haunted, Part Four

Plot - Recovered from his beating, John starts calling in favors as Map kills two of Wright’s men who come for him.

Prominent People - First appearance of Haine (an old psychic)

Deaths - Josuha Wright kills Sparrowfart and a bloody if generic manner.


Hellblazer #138 – Haunted, Part Five

Plot - John pulls more and more favors together, as he gets ready to turn the tables on Joshua Wright.

Prominent People - First appearance of Joshua Wright (a dark magician and Isabel’s killer)


Hellblazer #139 – Haunted, Part Six

Plot - With Wright in police custody, John and Watford set about instituting a very special punishment for Joshua Wright.



Hellblazer #140 – Locked

Plot - Watford calls John in on a most unusual homicide case involving a room that inspires people to commit murder.


Hellblazer #141 – The Crib

Plot - John winds up on the doorstep of writer David Niles, who fears he has become possessed by a cursed box that holds the aborted corpse of the Anti-Christ.


Hellblazer #141A – Shoot (Unpublished Story)

Plot - John journeys to America to investigate the secret causes of school shooting and winds up telling the truth nobody wants to hear to an investigator working for the US Senate.


Hellblazer #142 –Setting Sun

Plot - John is called to the scene of a haunting and must put the ghost of a Japanese war criminal to rest.


Hellblazer #142 –One Last Love Song

Plot - Leaving the bar three sheets to the wind, John thinks of all his old girlfriends.

Prominent People - First appearances of Mandy (a drama student), Annabel (a colonel’s daughter), Tess (a girl John met in a club once ) and Keeley (a girl who apparently married up and became a vampire). Cameoes by Emma and Isabel.

Pub Trivia - For some odd reason, Kit and Dani don’t seem to be in the group of girlfriends at the end of the story.


Hellblazer #143 – Telling Tales

Plot - A general writer asks John Constantine to tell him of the secret history of London, including a famous maker of artificial phalluses, the Royal Family being aliens and how the Kennedy assassination really happened.

Pub Trivia - Most of John’s secret history is taken whole from the theories of conspiracy theorist David Icke, particularly the bits about the British Royal Family being lizard-like aliens.




Recommended Reading




Son of Man is a must read simply because it’s Garth Ennis writing the character who made his career. It’s not the best thing he ever wrote with John but it’s nowhere near bad.

Haunted is worth reading just to see the first appearances of some characters who would later be used to great effecter by Mike Carey. Otherwise, you can just skip anything else Warren Ellis wrote during this period without fear of missing anything important to the larger Hellblazer Epoch.




The Final Analysis




Many people wonder what might have been and what stories might have come down the pike later, had Warren Ellis stayed on Hellblazer. They wonder what Warren might have written had he kept going and had a 40 issue run, like Jenkins, Ennis or Jenkins. They consider Warren Ellis’ abrupt departure from Hellblazer to be a great loss.

To put it plainly, I am not one of these people. Indeed, I think Warren Ellis is perhaps the most overrated writer to ever work on Hellblazer.

This is not to say that I don’t like anything he has written. I just don’t believe that an extended Warren Ellis run would have been the new golden age of Hellblazer that all the fans were hoping for had he just been given more time.

One of Ellis’ biggest weaknesses as an author is a tendency to shout editorials through his characters. On a book like Transmetropolitan or anything with Ellis’ own characters, this can be done brilliantly. But the way he uses John in most of his one-shot stories is a bad fit to the character.

Most of Ellis’ one-shot stories are less about John Constantine as a man and more about John Constantine as a myth. While the idea of seeing John from the perspective of someone who doesn’t know that he is 90% bluff and bluster is an interesting one in theory, it just doesn’t seem to work in practice in the stories Locked and The Crib.

Haunted also suffers for being too long by half. The third part is about nothing – nothing but John waking up in the gutter, calling Chas, and threatening Sparrowfart. Even for the master of decompressed storytelling, this is a bit ridiculous. This story could easily have been told in four issues and seems to have been “written for the trade”, even though this book came out before “written for the trade” became a rule of thumb for most publishers.

And I’m going to take a stand here and say that it’s a damn good thing Vertigo decided NOT to publish Shoot. I’m firmly against censorship but this isn’t truly censorship. A publisher deciding not to publish something it doesn’t think will sell or otherwise be bad for business is just standard. And releasing this story so shortly after the Columbine Shootings WOULD have been salt in the wound to a lot of people – particularly since John’s conclusion about why school shootings happen is basically that American Kids are too stupid, cowardly and/or apathetic to fight back when their lives are in danger.

Quite honestly, ignoring all the controversy, Shoot isn’t that good of a story. And Warren Ellis’ Hellblazer run wasn’t all that great.


Tune in next week. Same Matt time. Same Matt website.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Looking To The Stars - Hellblazer Episode Guide, Part Three






For those playing catch-up, here’s PART ONE and PART TWO

And just so we know what the score is, once again, here’s all the things we’ll keep track of as we go along. Just for laughs, eh?

Plot - What happens in the story worth noting, without giving away too much. Our job isn’t to tell you the story. It’s to help those who read the story keep track of the details. Go buy the comics and read them yourself, you lazy, cheap wankers!

Prominent People - Characters whom we see more than once. First appearances, mentions of reoccurring characters, anything on the hierarchy of Hell, real life figures drawn into the story and anyone else who deserves noting.

Deaths - Any deaths of prominent people or any particularly gory and interesting ways of dying. This is a horror book, after all. Also, a running tally of all the times John has directly been involved in a friend or family member’s death. Deaths of enemies, except where John directly murdered the person in question, are not counted. Instances where it is unclear if the person died (Talbot in Issue #22) or where they probably would have died with our without John showing up (i.e. Una in Issue #25) are not counted.

John Screws Up - This happens quite a bit, but anytime John is directly or indirectly responsible for some bad thing or another happening, we note it. We advise not making a drinking game of this for two reasons – first, you’ll get pissed very quickly and be unable to keep reading and second, because you might spill lager on your comics!

Pub Trivia - Anything else worth noting that doesn’t fit one of the other categories.

Simple enough, right? So let’s get down to it and discuss...


The (brief) Return of Jamie Delano and (too brief) Run of Eddie Campbell


Hellblazer #84-88





Issue #84 marked the start of what would become another tradition among Hellblazer writers – the brief return of an old writer to tell a new story. In this case, Delano explored one of the big unanswered questions regarding longtime Constantine companion Chas Chandler. We had heard John say several times, when Chas complained about John calling him yet again for a ride into some disaster area, that Chas owed him. Now we would learn the story of why.

This was followed by a four-issue mini-series by Eddie Campbell. Campbell was best known at the time for his work as an artist on From Hell with Alan Moore and was an accomplished writer/artist on his own self-published works. His one four-part story, Warped Notions, is a break-neck world-wide romp that, unusually for a Hellblazer story, seems to be require more issues than it was allowed.

Reportedly Vertigo editorial required numerous rewrites of the plot, which was more fantastic than horrific for their liking. Indeed, the story does feature some of the most overt use of magic and the supernatural of any John Constantine story ever and at times it feels more like an issue of The Invisibles than of Hellblazer. Despite this, I can’t help but like the story and wish Campbell might have been given a little more time to develop some of the ideas he was forced to deal with in brief here.


Hellblazer #84 – In Another Part of Hell

Plot - As John waits for Chas to return from the hospital with his daughter and first grandchild, he remembers how he and Chas met.

Prominent People - Bit of a family profile this. We get our first appearance of Chas’ wife Renee, Chas’ daughter Geraldine, Chas’ unnamed granddaughter, Chas’ mother Queenie Chandler and Queenie’s familiar, Stag.

Deaths - 21 and 22 on the dead tally. John strangles/drowns Stag and Queenie dies off camera due to her connection to Stag.

Pub Trivia - Though we have heard her shouting at Chas before in past issues, this is the first time we see Rene Chandler in the flesh.


Hellblazer #85 – The Delicate Power of Terror (Warped Notions, Part One)

Plot - While working on an exorcism for a friend, John is recruited into the latest incarnation of The Hellfire Club to stop the unraveling of reality.

Prominent People - First appearance of John’s friend Sam and her uncle Arthur. (Possible Bewitched reference?) The new Hellfire Club is led by the ghost of Sir Francis Dashwood – the real life founder of what came to be known as the Hellfire Club in England. We also get introduced to Murnarr, a cat demon and the “unfortunate Bona Dea” – an armless and eyeless woman, which seems quite fitting if she truly is the goddess of the positive divine aspects of women, given how badly the feminine divine has been abused in the world of Hellblazer.

Pub Trivia - This may just be me, but I think the possessed Uncle Arthur DOES look a bit like Paul Lynde. Can anyone get a hold of Sean Phillips to confirm this?



Hellblazer #86 – The Everything Virus (Warped Notions, Part Two)

Plot - Gone to America, John meets Ben Franklin and is abducted by The Church of Virtual Reality, who believe a virus unleashed by deforestation is responsible for destroying reality.

Prominent People - The ghost of Ben Franklin (a real life friend to the real-life Sir Francis Dashwood) makes an appearance. We also have the first (and last) appearance of several members of The Church of Virtual Reality.

Deaths - Murnarr kills all of the Church of Virtual Reality members who are holding John, just as they are letting him go.


Hellblazer #87 – The Shout (Warped Notions, Part Three)

Plot - An emergency landing in Australia gets John to start questioning exactly what is causing reality to go crazy.

Prominent People - First appearance of Jeffo, an Aboriginal shaman and The Rainbow Serpent (a major god of the Aboriginal faith)

Deaths - Murnarr is struck by lightning while in battle with The Rainbow Serpent

John Screws Up - John has a revelation here that Sir Dashwood is the cause of reality’s collapse and that John’s helping him has only been facilitating a plan that would allow Dashwood greater power over the world. Ironically, this comes about as he’s watching Murder She Wrote in a pub and jokes that Angela Lansbury’s character must be a serial killer, all the times she keeps winding up at murder scenes.



Hellblazer #88 – Mountains of Madness (Warped Notions, Part Four)

Plot - John ventures into the rainforest, looking for a remote place to confront Sir Francis Dashwood.

Prominent People - First appearance of Delvene, an Aussie ship captain.




And now that that brief digression is out of the way, let us move on to the next major author to write a substantial portion of the Hellblazer mythology. I speak of the Yorkshire-born writer/editor for Mirage Comics (yes, the Ninja Turtle guys) and all around loveable guy, Paul Jenkins.



The Paul Jenkins Era


Hellblazer #89-128




If Ennis had a tough time of it following Delano, than Jenkins had the toughest start of any Hellblazer writer to date. Like Ennis, he was an unknown and unproven writer in the American comic book arena. But unlike Ennis, Jenkins had the misfortune to follow after not one but three acclaimed writers. Despite the misgivings some had over Campbell’s brief Hellblazer run, he was still respected for his work on From Hell. Delano’s recent turn with #84 had shown new and old fans alike how it all got started. And Ennis had just recently started a new series, Preacher with frequent Hellblazer artist Steve Dillon that was won acclaim and attention from the very first issue.

Faced with such a legacy and pedigree behind him, Jenkins started his run the only way he could – by building on what had come before. His run would start with a tale using the characters from Campbell’s brief run as John had one more adventure in Australia. Later, he would take the book back to its’ Delano roots by doing more stories based on the unique mythology of England than the more Judeo-Christian themes explored by Ennis. But like Ennis, Jenkins would expand upon John’s past, introducing thus far unseen members of John’s wide circle of friends while utilizing some of the few members of Ennis’ cast that still lived.




Hellblazer #89 – Dreamtime

Plot - John learns from Jeffo that the Rainbow Serpent is planning to bring about the end of the world for “the white men” – unless he can con his way into saving a sacred site from land developers.

Prominent People - First appearance of Kate Grimshaw (a racist Aussie land-owner and right nasty cow)


Hellblazer #90 – Dangerous Ground

Plot - John comes face to face with The Rainbow Serpent and cuts a deal to save the white man and let the Serpent save face before her followers.

Prominent People - JFK’s face appears in a mural of Dreamtime images.

Deaths - A very cool scene here as Kate Grimshaw and her thugs are eaten by the Rainbow Serpent. Or an Earthquake, depending on your viewpoint.


Hellblazer #91 – Riding The Green Lanes

Plot - John runs into some old friends and goes to a punk gathering where a battle with police mixes with a ghostly memory of the War of the Roses. And John puts to rest the spirit of an old friend who disappeared while trying to fly on his bike.

Prominent People - First appearance of Rich The Punk (an old friend from John’s punk-rocker days), Michelle (Rich’s green-haired wife) Syder (Rich and Michelle’s son), Deanie (an old friend of John’s who loved bike-riding) and Muppet (a right nasty man with nasty habits)

Deaths - Quite a few bloody soldiers as the war goes on. John helps Dean to pass-on to the other side.

Pub Trivia - Rich’s nickname for John is “Conjob”. Rich is also reportedly based on Paul Jenkins’ brother. This issue is also somewhat famous as “The one with the ET parody cover”.


Hellblazer #92 – Bait (Critical Mass, Part One)

Plot - As John tries to enjoy a peaceful weekend of ghost-hunting, plans are put in motion to bring The First of the Fallen back to power.

Prominent People - First appearance of Buer (once a contemporary of Aleister Crowley, now a masochist demon lord in love with The First of the Fallen, who sees to all the children trapped in Hell). There’s also a flashback where we see most of John’s friends involved in the Newcastle incident.

John Screws Up - Really, the blame could fall on Rich and Michelle for not doing their job as parents and watching their child themselves, but if John had been watching Syder instead of watching his friends play, Buer would never have gotten a hold of Syder.

Pub Trivia - We find out the First of the Fallen didn’t die at the end of “Rake at the Gates of Hell” but was instead rendered mortal and that to rule Hell once again, he must win the soul of “the one most hated” (i.e. John Constantine). Also, we learn that John’s demon blood bubbles at the presence of true evil in the air, giving him a sort of proximity alarm of bad things coming.

Hellblazer #93 – Troubled Waters (Critical Mass, Part Two)

Plot - Faced with the ultimatum of giving up his soul or allowing Syder to become a plaything of Hell, John goes looking for an answer in the mystic town of Abaton.

Prominent People - First appearance (in this series anyway) of Jack of the Green – a plant elemental, like Swamp Thing, who is mystically bound to the green lands of England. Also the first appearance of Robert the Smith (aka Robin Hood) and Maewren, a seductress fae. Astra, or a vision of her, appears briefly being tortured by Buer.

John Screws Up - Because John has a demon’s blood, he is considered, by the laws of Hell, to be at least a demon on paper and responsible for the debts of the demon whose blood he shares. It is through this loophole that Buer is able to take possession of Syder. In short, it’s all John’s fault.


Hellblazer #94 – The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea (Critical Mass, Part Three)

Plot - Finding he is doomed to Hell and haunted by visions of children suffering, John considers his bleak plight only to get some unexpected help from... a stranger.

Prominent People - Cameo appearance by The Phantom Stranger, who is amazingly eager to help John given his treatment back in Hellblazer #63. Reference is also made to “The Dream Lord” (aka Morpheus) who allows The Phantom Stranger to visit John in his dreams.


Hellblazer #95 – Coming Up For Air (Critical Mass, Part Four)

Plot - Inspired by a wrong number, John heads to Scotland in search of a legend. But is it inspiration? Or have the visions of children in Hell finally destroyed John’s mind along with his quickly rotting body?

Prominent People - Alister Crowley, an infamous real life magician of referred to appears in the flesh for the first time – apparently alive and well and hiding in a series of magic circles on a lake shore in Scotland for about 40 years. Also, the first appearance of what will become The Demonic John Constantine.


Hellblazer #96 – Hook, Line and Sinker (Critical Mass, Part Five)

Plot - With the soula of Syder and every child doomed to Hell in the balance, including Astra whom he was responsible for damning 15 years before, John pulls the ultimate con on Hell once again. But will there be a happy ending for John even if he can save the children?

Deaths - The First of the Fallen claims Buer’s soul along with The Demon John Constantine. Cameo appearance by John’s succubus friend Ellie.

John Screws Up - John almost pulls off a total victory. He saves Astra from Hell, along with every other child ever condemned to damnation. He gets rid of all the bad parts of his own soul, allowing the darker part of himself to ascend to demonhood in Hell. And he puts the screws to Buer but good by fulfilling the letter of the law if not the spirit (i.e. John’s sins plus his love for Kit grafted onto Alister Crowley’s soul) and bringing the First of the Fallen back but leaving him unable to get to the sweet spots of John Constantine – the only bits of the soul worth having for a demon. Yes, it works pretty well... except the Ellie, who saved John’s arse in “Rake at the Gates of Hell” now has the Devil tearing Hell apart looking for the one who helped John Constantine defeat him. John says it best – “I’ve given myself a chance at a better life – a fresh start with no complications and unnecessary baggage. Two hours in and already I’ve started to bugger it up...”


Hellblazer #97 – The Nature of the Beast

Plot - A chance walk into the woods at night leads John to a most unusual Tarot reading from a most unusual teller.

Prominent People - First appearance of Tom the Gypsy Shepherd (aka the Judeo-Christian God Almighty)

John Screws Up - Though John is attempting a fresh start in life, we get our first foreshadowing here that John is going to, sooner or later, return to his usual wicked ways.

Pub Trivia - The Tarot reading John receives is a basic past-present-future reading that results in The Fox (trickery and deceit), The Butterfly (change and choice) and The Fox.


Hellblazer #98 – Walking the Dog

Plot - John is called in to rid a friend’s flat of the angry spirit of an abused dog.

Prominent People - First appearance of Staff (a huge epileptic man and old friend of John’s), Betty (Straff’s equally epileptic mother) and Lofty (Muppet’s best friend)


Hellblazer #99 – Punkin’ Up The Great Outdoors

Plot - John plans a day trip to Abaton, only to have things go horribly wrong for two of his friends.

Prominent People - First appearance of Terry and Sadie, two more of John’s friends from his punk days.

Deaths - 23 and 24 on the Death Tally. Because of their breaking the rules of Abaton, reality shifts so that Terry and Sadie – once a happy couple and happier in Abaton where their spirits were free of their troubled life – are less happy. Terry is left drugged out of his gourd, his mind truly in Abaton most of the time and Sadie, denied the same bliss, drowns herself.

John Screws Up - If John had never taken his friends to Abaton, Sadie and Terry might have survived in their slightly less miserable state.


Hellblazer #100 –

Plot - Knocked into a coma as his wicked lifestyle plays havoc on his newly purified body, John’s soul is taken on a tour of a remodeled Hell and to a meeting with his dear damned father.

Prominent People - Thomas Constantine, John’s father, makes an appearance here. He’s been damned to Hell by the hatred of his own son and for causing the death of his wife.

Deaths - It is revealed that Thomas Constantine was responsible for his wife’s death, having forced her to have an abortion while she was pregnant with John. His punishment for this in Hell is to be strung up by a string of wire coat-hangers.

Pub Trivia - The details of John’s birth here seem to contradict those shown during issues #39-40 with nothing being said of “The Golden Boy” (aka John’s healthier twin), suggesting that either John and The Golden Boy both had flawed visions of their respective births based on Thomas’ lies to them OR that when they were reborn in #40 reality was rewritten so there had only ever been one John Constantine in both realities, who wasn’t born in a hospital.


Hellblazer #101 – Football: It's a Funny Old Game

Plot - John is dragged out of his sick bed to go to what promises to be a relaxing English soccer game. At least until the demonic manifestation of football hooliganism shows up.

Prominent People - First appearance of The Football Hooligan Demon (FHD).

Deaths - 25 on the death tally. John picks a random hooligan causing trouble to satisfy the blood lust of The FHD

John Screws Up - John is forced to pick a random stranger so that the FHDwill be appeased and not start a riot.


Hellblazer #102 – The Single Sided Coin (Difficult Beginnings, Part One)

Plot - Feeling bored with life, John starts looking for answers – only to find that he must regain his dark side or be destroyed.

Prominent People - First appearance of Wong- a Chinese restaurant manager and I-Ching reader. First appearance of Mr. Dalton-Brewer, the evil doctor in charge of John’s care in Ravenscar.

John Screws Up - We find out here that in pulling the con he did in Critical Mass, John has screwed up his internal balance. There is no Yang to his Yin any more.

Pub Trivia - John is told by his I Ching reading that to find his balance again he must take a journey to become whole. The places he must go are The Earth (i.e. the forest in #98) A Place of Thunder (Ravenscar Asylum, where he goes at the end of this issue), A Place of Water – and then he will go either to The Mountain (for balance) or The Fire (for a darkening of the light).


Hellblazer #103 – The Trouble With Worms (Difficult Beginnings, Part Two)

Plot - John rides the Synchronicity Highway looking for his place of water, only to uncover the terrible secret of the most evil man in Britain.

Prominent People - First appearance of Trevor Pritchard, a grandfather and bait-salesman whose faked serial killer confession wound up delaying the police investigation of The Yorkshire Slasher, allowing the killer to claim another victim before being caught. We also see the first appearance of The Demon Constantine, as a demon.


Hellblazer #104 – The Darkening of the Light (Difficult Beginnings, Part Three)

Plot - With his bad self refusing to rejoin him, John’s only hope at regaining a dark-side lies in screwing an old friend. Literally.

Prominent People - Cameo appearances by Ellie, Alister Crowley (as the soul at the core of the Demon John being tortured) and The First of the Fallen.

John Screws Up - We find out here that when John created the sigil that protected Ellie from The First of The Fallen (way back in #61), he put some of his blood into the mix. What this means is that when John dies, the sigil loses its’ power. While this does keep Ellie from killing John after he uses her (sex with a succubus being as corrupting a force as any), this will have dire consequences for John later in the Jenkins’ run.


Hellblazer #105 – A Taste of Heaven

Plot - John and Rich take a job as landscapers and John is told a tale of his ancestor, James Constantine.

Prominent People - First appearance of John’s 17th century ancestor, the magus/con-man James Constantine. Cameo by Kubla Khan author Samuel Taylor Coleridge.

Pub Trivia - We find out in this story that John’s ancestor was the infamous “Person from Porlock” who interrupted Coleridge as he was writing Kubla Khan.


Hellblazer #106 – In The Line of Fire, Part One

Plot - John investigates a house that doesn’t exist and the ghost of a man who killed himself after he lost the girl he gave his all for.

Prominent People - First appearance of Jack Loudfoot (ghost of a WWII soldier at Dunkirk), Ellen (aka Nellie – Jack’s fiancĂ©) and Bill Greenwood (friend of John and Nellie’s eventual husband)


Hellblazer #107 – In The Line of Fire, Part Two

Plot - John tries to put the ghost of Jack Loudfoot to rest, if not at peace.

Prominent People - First appearance of Weeble – a medium friend of John’s.


Hellblazer #108 – Days of Wine and Roses

Plot - John scores an invite to a high-society orgy with blackmail on his mind. Little does he realize that his fake fertility rite will have dire consequences.

Prominent People - First appearance of The Mendw, “the he and she of wine and flower”- nature spirits connected to The Green that seem similar to the Bacchae of Greek Myth.

Deaths - 26 on the dead tally. John’s summoning kills Jason Carpenter, a total bastard of a man, is ripped apart by The Mendw after trying to rape his own daughter.

John Screws Up - John’s summoning gets a man killed though it is no small loss given the man.


Hellblazer #109 – The Wild Hunt

Plot - John is dragged to the country to investigate a series of sheep killings, finding a werewolf and a sign of bad things coming.

Prominent People - First appearance of Chas’ Uncle Wilf, a shepherd and Phil, Chas’ cousin. More importantly, the first appearance of Danita “Dani” Wright – an American tabloid reporter and eventually JC love interest.

Deaths - While not really a death per say, Phil gets infected by lycanthropy and is forced to join with a tribe of werewolves leaving John to explain his disappearance to Phil’s parents and Chas.

Pub Trivia - This marks the moment John finds out that spirits, fairies and werewolves are, for some reason, being forced back into a world that no longer has room for them and it’s up to him to fix it.


Hellblazer #110 – A Different Kind of Tension (Last Man Standing, Part One of Five)

Plot - John’s found happiness in a new relationship, so the end of it all must be near. Signs and portents fortel the death of England as a Mr. Meardon plots to pave the last sacred sites of England and King Arthur’s knights rise up to search for their lost lord.

Prominent People - First appearances of Arthur’s last knights (Owain, Sgilti, Afagddu and Sandda) as well as Mr. Meardon (aka Merlin)

Pub Trivia - In this issue, John and Dani officially become a couple. And John is formally asked to be Godfather to Rich and Michelle’s new baby. Also, Sir Francis Drake’s drum beating itself and the ravens fleeing the Tower of London are true legendary portents of bad times falling upon England.


Hellblazer #111 – No More Heroes (Last Man Standing, Part Two of Five)

Plot - John learns of Merlin’s plot and that he must find the one true heir to Arthur’s throne to save England. Good news is he finds him easily. Bad news is it’s Rich the Punk.

Prominent People - First appearance of Dez, a computer-geek friend of John’s. (No relation to the now-dead Dez of the Ennis run, obviously)

Deaths - 27 on the death tally. Dez is killed as soon as he is introduced, to prove to John that Merlin can get at any of his friends at anytime. Merlin’s men kill the knights pretty easily but it is, we are reassured, not permanent given the blessing the knights have.


Hellblazer #112 – Human Punk (Last Man Standing, Part Three of Five)

Plot - Stoned out of his gourd, Rich is sent on a spiritual journey to reclaim the casket that Merlin seeks, as John stands buy waiting for an answer.

Prominent People - First appearance of Bran the Blessed (a severed head). Cameo appearance by Geoffrey Chaucer – author of The Canterbury Tales.

Pub Trivia - Bran the Blessed bears more than a striking resemblance to actor Brian Blessed.


Hellblazer #113 – You’re Just A... (Last Man Standing, Part Four of Five)

Plot - John tries to scare his friends off with the truth and a most horrific meal. But Merlin’s plans are easily adaptable and while John may have averted disaster for England, his friends may pay the price regardless.

Deaths - 28 on the death tally, though we don’t find out until next issue. John stews Bran the Blessed’s head so that the knowledge he safeguarded will be spread about all of John’s friends.


Hellblazer #114 – No One Is Innocent (Last Man Standing, Part Five of Five)

Plot - With all his friends’ on the line, John lets Merlin in on his master-plan and King Arthur returns in the flesh to explain all.

Prominent People - King Arthur, seen before in John’s visions, makes his first true appearance.

John Screws Up - John pulls a total bastard maneuver, breaking up with Dani and saying she’ll never see him again only to show up on her doorstep saying he’s changed his mind.


Hellblazer #115 – In The Red Corner

Plot - When Dani’s abusive ex-boyfriend makes a move on her, John sets about revenge as only he can.

Prominent People - First appearance of Lady Jamma (a voodoo priestess) and Greg, Dani’s ex.


Hellblazer #116 – Windershins, Part One

Plot - John and Rich’s gang join in to help a friend move, as the ghosts of a local cemetery suddenly become restless.

Prominent People - First appearance of Solobodan (a Serbian immigrant and ex-soldier) and his daughter.


Hellblazer #117 – Windershins, Part Two

Plot - The cause of supernatural unrest proves to have a most mundane cause. And for once, John is able to fix the signs of the problem.

Prominent People - Cameo appearance by Sir Francis Bacon in flashback.


Hellblazer #118 – Life and Death and Taxis

Plot - John winds up leading two hurried trips to the hospital as Michelle goes into labor and Straff’s mother has a heart attack.

Prominent People - First appearance of Ivy Mae (Rich and Michelle's baby daughter)

Deaths - Betty, Straff’s mother, dies in the hospital at the same time Ivy Mae is born.


Hellblazer #119 – Undertow

Plot - While trying to replace Dani’s dead goldfish, John is suddenly hit by a psychic vision of the spirit of disaster infecting a small airplane above him.


Hellblazer #120 – Desperately Seeking Something

Plot - An exercise in meta-fiction, John, self-aware that he is a fictional character for one story, takes the reader on a personal journey into his world.

Prominent People - First appearances of Archie Fein (who runs a magic shop), Tony (a friend who does a miracle healing scam) and Chas’s Uncle Dave, a ventriloquist who once helped Chas play a joke on the too serious John. As for reoccurring characters, Chripes, who DOESN’T reappear in this issue? Among the confirmed real-life living folks represented are John Constantine writers Alan Moore (in silhouette), Garth Ennis, Jamie Delano and Paul Jenkins (aka Rich’s little brother) – Hellblazer artists Will Simpson and Sean Phillips. – Hellblazer editors Lou Stathis, Stuart Moore and Axel Alonso. Jack of the Green and King Arthur appear and Death of the Endless makes an appearance as the bartender in the bar hosting the Ghostly Horde of those killed because of their connections to Constantine. This includes Gary Lester, Ray Monde, Ric the Vic, Header, Astra, Thomas Constantine, Nigel Archer, Brendan Finn, Kate Grimshaw, Sister Ann Marie and Frank North.

John Screws Up - John botches the containment of the demon he wishes to show the reader.

Pub Trivia - Despite having been freed to Heaven or having died in a manner unrelated to John’s dealings, Astra and Brendan Finn are seen with the ghostly horde. This seems to lend credence to the theory that the ghosts are just figments of John’s guilt-ridden imagination. Problem with that theory is, when we see them in this issue, John is nowhere in sight. Perhaps they get a day-pass from Heaven to haunt John out of sympathy for the friends John was responsible for leading astray. The reader is also offered a bribe by John for keeping his darkest secret – he makes dollhouse furniture as a hobby.


Hellblazer #121 – Up the Down Staircase, Part One

Plot - John travels to American to meet Dani’s family, only to bring a certain unwanted someone along with him. Meanwhile, Gavin, an old associate of Constantine contemplates suicide over the death of his girlfriend, Pam.

Prominent People - First appearance of Dani’s family, including her grandfather, mother Mary, uncle Fred, cousin Terrel, Terrel’s wife “The Zombie” and Dani’s brothers Kyle, Ethan and Eldrick. Also the first appearance of Gavin and Pam.


Hellblazer #122 – Up the Down Staircase, Part Two

Plot - Pam returns to Gavin, hole in her head and all. Meanwhile, The First of the Fallen taunts John with how the consumerist American lifestyle is bringing the whole nation over to the side of the devils as John must ask himself one question to stop it; what is a quiz?

Prominent People - First appearance of Lenny (a hypnotist con-artist) and George (a Vietnam Vet)


Hellblazer #123 – Up the Down Staircase, Part Three

Plot - Pam tells Gavin that John Constantine was to blame for her death, not him. Meanwhile, tensions mount in the Wright family household as John struggles to find out what a quiz is and turns to the unlikely George for an answer.


Hellblazer #124 – Up the Down Staircase, Part Four

Plot - John gets Weeble and Lenny to help him with freeing Dani’s family of the greed and consumerism that threatens to destroy them. Meanwhile, Gavin – spurred on by what he thinks is the ghost of Pam – sets about destroying John Constantine.


Hellblazer #125 – Blowing on the Embers (How To Play With Fire, Part One)

Plot - Gavin and “Pam” put their plans into motion as Muppet is injured in a car wreck and The Demon Beur is summoned to goad Lofty into wrath against John Constantine. Slobodan is forced to relive the nightmares of his time in war, while being told John is the one responsible. Finally, Jack of the Green is forced to remove Abaton from the mortal world, due to Muppet’s injury releasing the power within him. And “Pam” reveals herself to be Ellie.

John Screws Up - While John’s actions in Last Man Standing helped to stop Merlin at the time (i.e. take the poison meant to destroy all the immortals on Earth), here they lead to the accidental poisoning of the fairy realm of Abaton when Muppet is injured. Also, it is worth noting again that had John been straight with Ellie about why he needed to sleep with her before, he might well have avoided spurring her to revenge.


Hellblazer #126 – Fanning the Flames (How To Play With Fire, Part Two)

Plot - Ellie’s plans continue to unfold, as Bauer bargains with Crowley to remove Weeble from the picture and end his own personal torments. Straf becomes lost in his own torments and the Masters family become haunted by images of Thomas Constantine’s torture in Hell. John finds out the Demon Constantine is now suffering the full pain of Hell, with Crowley having won his freedom. And Ellie breaks up John’s relationship with Dani, after framing him for cheating on her.


Hellblazer #127 – Burning Down The House (How To Play With Fire, Part Three)

Plot - Faced with no other options before him, John sells his soul to The First of the Fallen to save his friends and then goes to God for some answers.

Deaths - 29 on the Death Tally. Ellie may not be technically alive, but John does set about making her eternal state of existence awfully unpleasant.


Hellblazer #128 – Sifting Through the Ashes (How To Play With Fire, Part Four)

Plot - John has a chat with God and tries to bargain his soul back with the threat of his taking over Hell.

Prominent People - Triskele, Wyrm Queen of the Succubae makes an appearance torturing Ellie. Beur is also back in Hell, being tormented by The First of the Fallen AND The Demon Constantine.

John Screws Up - John says it himself as he reflects on how he saved his friends, but can’t ever see most of them again. “In the end, it didn’t work out too terribly. Really. I mean, nobody got hurt too badly. Nothing that can’t be fixed, given enough time. Nobody died. Except me.”




Recommended Reading




All of Jenkins’ multi-part stories are worth checking out, in my humble opinion. Critical Mass compares quite well to Ennis’ first ‘John Outsmarts Hell’ tale Dangerous Habits and How To Play With Fire is every bit the equal of Rake At The Gates of Hell as far as conclusions go. Indeed, I actually find Up The Down Staircase to be a superior Brit criticism of American culture than Ennis’ Damnation’s Flame.

Some of the single-issue stories are hit-and-miss, but not particularly bad if just not as epic as one expects from a Hellblazer story. Windershins is perhaps the most most anti-climactic Hellblazer story ever, as John stops a supernatural invasion by turning a directional sign around.

Issues #100 and #120 however, should be required reading for any fan of the character and indeed, should be collected in a TP edition along with other brief stories of note.



The Final Analysis




Most Hellblazer writers can have their vision of John Constantine divided into one of two camps – Good-Hearted Fool or Total Bastard. Jenkins’ John Constantine is easily one of the former. And this is why I believe many fans late to Hellblazer eschew the Jenkins run.

Many of these fans, coming to the book from the fandom of the other works of Ennis, Ellis or Azzarello do not want to read about a John Constantine who has any emotions apart from guilt and contempt. They do not want John to have any motivations for what he does other than self-preservation and the curiosity of a child poking a chained dog with a stick. And then certainly don’t want John to contemplate, however briefly, the idea of settling down and trying to have as normal a life as possible. Perhaps this is why Jenkins’ work continues to be the only major part of the series not collected in trade-paperback form?

Or perhaps it is simple marketing - all the other major authors on Hellblazer, who had their works made into TP format wrote acclaimed works for Vertigo and Wildstorm Comics. Perhaps their stories were traded only to take more money out of the fans of 100 Bullets, Preacher and The Authority?

Or perhaps it is simple politics and the fact that after his Hellblazer run, Jenkins was signed on by Marvel and went on to become a popular writer on Spider-Man?

Whatever the case, the fact that such pivotal stories as Critical Mass and How To Play With Fire go uncollected while rather lackluster stories like Freezes Over are put into TP format is nothing less than criminal.

This is not to say that Jenkins’ run was entirely flawless. But I do not believe it is all as bad as its’ critics claim. Their main beef with Jenkins’ work seems to be that it is not Garth Ennis’s Hellblazer.

Some claim that Jenkins work is too derivative of Ennis’ while lacking the stomach to be as gruesome. While it is fair to say that Jenkins did borrow a lot of characters and concepts from Ennis’ work (and indeed, Delano’s run), I believe it was more to continue a legacy than to steal from the ghosts of the past - to stand on the shoulders of giants to see further, as Sir Issac Newton once said.

As for the charges that Jenkins was never gruesome, I don’t recall Ennis’ John Constantine tricking his friends into committing cannibalism. But then again, my sense of gruesome extends past vomiting blood and gaping wounds.

As for the supporting cast, while it is true that Rich, Michelle, Dani and company were not quite as colorful as Brendan, Ric the Vic and Header, they were never meant to be. Jenkins run introduced a sort of mid-life crisis to John – something he had never truly had despite his worries about growing older in the Ennis run – hence the more low-key and domestic characters to show John another path taken by the people he once lived the wild life with.

I think perhaps the problem is that Jenkins made these characters too complex compared to the rather broad supporting cast Ennis and Delano favored. Great as all these characters are, it took a lot more time to set up family-man punk Rich than it did to set up the stereotypes of Ennis’ hard-drinking Irish magician Brendan or Delano’s Rastafarian hippie Errol. To the mind of many fans, this difference was bad, though Jenkins is now celebrated for his ability to create such nuanced supporting characters.

The one bit of criticism I do agree with is that Dani was a rather poor choice for a Constantine love-interest. She was a good character but she was no Kit Ryan and her whirlwind courtship with John was too much, too fast compared to the slow courtship Kit and John had under Ennis. But given the trauma that John had come though, his falling for a more openly loving, more “normal” woman made an odd sort of sense for a rebound relationship.

In conclusion, Jenkins run is the buried treasure of the Hellblazer series. It may not shine as bright as the golden age of Garth Ennis. But it shines like sterling silver, nevertheless.

Tune in next week. Same Matt time. Same Matt website.