Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Skyrim: A Journal of War - Chapter Thirty-Two: A Book Long Overdue

From The Saga of Matthias The Bather, Written By Sven

Matthias and Mjoll did search long and far for word of where an Elder Scroll might be found in the cold reaches of Skyrim. In time, they returned to the Skyhaven Temple of the Blades and sought the wisdom of the archivist Esbern...

Me: So, that's long and the short of it. I'll need an Elder Scroll to get any further.
Esbern: Ah, indeed? There's a pretty puzzle. Not the kind of thing you'll find in your local bookshop. Let me think...
Me: Wait a second... there's bookshops in Skyrim?
Esbern: Silence! I must ponder...
Me: Seriously, all the books I've seen have been in dungeons, general stores and pawn shops! Point me to a bookshop! I want to see if I can find another one of those books that made me a little better at sword-fighting after I read it!
Esbern: I have it! The library at the Mage's College in Winterhold. If there is an Elder Scroll to be found in Skyrim, they will know how to find it. Perhaps they might even have one in their possession.
Me: Right. Well, as a scholar and the greatest expert on dragon lore in the land, I think...
Esbern: ... that I should stay here and continue preparing the temple while you journey to the Mage's College!
Me: Yes! Wait...
Esbern: Off you go, then!


Faralda: Welcome to the Whiterun College. Now leave!
Me: Woah! Hold on there-
Faralda: No, you hold on there! This is a place of higher-learning and great wisdom - not an attraction for tourists!
Me: But I'm no tourist!
Faralda: You're certainly not a mage! You look like the weaselly scoundrel who would steal the pants off a bandit corpse to make a fast bit of coin.
Mjoll: How dare you! Don't you realize that you are standing in the presence of The Dragonborn?
Faralda: Oh-ho? Well, as much as I'd love to take the word of some trollop in scanty furs, who lacks the wits to put on a suitable robe in the coldest city in Skyrim...
Mjoll: SAY AGAIN?!?
Me: By the Nine... stand down, Mjoll. There's an easy way to prove my identity...
Faralda: And how do you propose to do that?
Faralda: Ack! By the you can shout?
Uh... obviously.
Faralda: Well, that's a horse of a different color! Certainly, we will let you enroll in our college.
Me: Woah! Hold on! I didn't exactly plan to enroll...
Faralda: Of course you did. Now, if you'll just come this way, we'll get you set for orientation...


Mirabelle:... and over here, past the main quad, is the the Archmage's quarters. Now, I'll show you to your quarters. You're going to be sharing space with your fellow Apprentices, who you'll meet shortly...
Me: Yeah. Listen, I'm not enrolling. I just needed to see your library.
Mirabelle: Ah, but of course you're enrolling! Why else would you have come here if not to be a part of the Whiterun College?
Me: Because there's a prophecy about the end of the world that requires a scroll that may only be found in your archives.
Mirabelle: How fascinating. We must discuss that at the next Lyceum. Now, if you'll follow me this way...
Mjoll: Psttt.... beloved, I don't think she's actually listening to you. If you slipped off, I doubt she'd notice.
Me: I think you're right. You just keep nodding at her, I'll slip away and find the library...
Mjoll: Alright, beloved. But you will owe me greatly for this...
Me:... TWO Fur cloaks?
Mjoll: Three.
Me: Done!

Urag gro-Shub. Welcome to The Arcanaeum! I am the head librarian. Yes, I am an Orc. Want to fight about it?
Me: Uh, no. No. Why would I?
Urag gro-Shub: Many new students are surprised to find that there are Orcs capable of working magic, let alone that one runs the greatest collection of arcane knowledge in all of Skyrim. Many of them make jokes or say rude things about how Orcs are all crude savages with no place in a university like this.
Me: Ah. Well, I'd never dream of doing such a thing.
Urag gro-Shub: Good, because I broke the bones and sucked out the marrow of the last one who did.
Me: Ha! Haaaaaaaaaaa.... that's a joke right?
Urag gro-Shub: Yes, but even so you do not want to keep your books late.
Me: I'll keep that in mind. But really, there's only one book I need. A scroll, actually.
Urag gro-Shub: Oh so? You'll be telling me it's an Elder Scroll you're wanting.
Me: Well, now that you mention it...
Urag gro-Shub: Ha! If I had an Elder Scroll, it would be kept under the highest security. The greatest thief in the world wouldn't be able to lay a finger on it. I certainly wouldn't let a green apprentice check it out.
Urag gro-Shub: Yes. But I do not have one. So it is a moot point.
Me: And supposing someone were looking for an Elder Scroll?
Urag gro-Shub: I'd tell them to go and consult with the hermit mage Septimus Signus, who is the greatest expert on the Elder Scrolls that I know.
Me: And no doubt he lives somewhere far away, in a cave of ice.
Urag gro-Shub:You know... it's funny. But yes, he does!
Me: Of course...


Septimus Signus: ... well, of course I'd be all too happy to help you since the fate of the world is at stake. It just so happens that there is an Elder Scroll in the far distant Dwarven city of Blackreach.
Me: A dwarven city... underground?
Septimus Signus: Have you ever known of a dwarven city that was above ground?
Me: Point. And no doubt it's abandoned and filled with all manner of traps and clockwork guards.
Septimus Signus:Oh, it's not abandoned. There's a few hundred Falmer living there quite happily.
Me: Riiiiiiiiiight...


Paarthurnax: You have it. The Kal - the Elder Scroll. Tild krah... qaios. Time shudders at its' touch.
Me: Yeah. Yeah. It quivers like a schoolgirl. So.. how does this work?
Paarthurnax: Read the scroll before the mountain there. You cannot see the wound in time, but it is there.
Me: Okay, but I don't see how this could.... woah!

Me: Divines...I can see forever! Its' full of stars!
Paarthurnax: The battle with Alduin, Dovahkiin! Can you see it? Can you hear the shout?!
Me: Yes! I have it! I know the shout of Dragonrend! There is nothing Alduin can do to stand against me now!
Me: Oh Oblivion....

No comments:

Post a Comment